Recently while reading blogs I have noticed some comments regarding the quality available in the Sugar World and how this seems to be sadly lacking! I started contemplating this as I have had my share of contacts from fakes, pranksters and flat out kinky liars which I will explain later. I have changed my screening process, and now I am focusing on changing my profile but not my expectations. Having been in wonderful sugar arrangements before with exceptional S.D.'s I realize that in the past I have had the cream of the crop. Always being treated with dignity and respect... I did not realize when I started my new search how much the landscape in the Sugar World was changing. Like in real life we also must change with the times but I refuse to sacrifice my principles or expectations for something that would be sadly lacking! So let me set the stage for this lengthy exploration and what I am now learning.
In former sugar relationships, I felt pampered and always trusted my former S.D.'s without hesitation which happens with time. Each came with their own unique intriguing personalities and genuinely cared about my well being and in turn I cared about their well being making it easy to pamper and spoil them as well. I learned through these experiences that a good sugar arrangement for me was more than dollars and cents. It involved being honest, discreet when necessary, having good communication skills to avoid unwanted drama, carrying oneself with dignity and grace, enjoying laughter, hot passionate quiet moments together, being open to trying new things, positions, and mutual trust to share and try each others fantasies. This type of arrangement required me to be adaptable and often going the extra mile to cater to by S.D. which I did gratefully and gladly. I discovered so much about my own sensuality and sexuality ...that I realized just how good sugar sessions are.. hot.. sometimes wild.. sometimes romantic and so very satisfying. I was the lucky one.. each of my former S.D.'s are still friends today and I value their advice and wisdom. I tried a brief stint of traditional dating which left me completely flat after my last arrangement ended. Men my own age just do so little for me and men twice my age which I am attracted to seldom look my way in Real Life Situations.. unless they are looking for a S.B. ;).
Understanding exactly what I am searching for I set my sights on having another sugar arrangement but in my area the gene pool is sadly lacking.. so I expanded my search thinking I would find QUALITY by doing so. What I am learning is that my search is a work in progress.. for sure ;). In this economy there are people looking to take advantage.. and I am know realizing that my profile had given clues to the fakes that may be able to take advantage of my vulnerabilities and that I needed to look hard at how much I was giving away about myself.. for example not being in any relationship in real life... living alone.. the flexibility of my schedule and only asking for assistance and accepting it on the months that are hard for me to get through while in school. My frank honesty actually opened the doors to some of the bizarre contacts I have gotten. As I have talked to other S.B.'s whom I have made friends with I realized we all have similar stories and are all asking the same questions.. where are the quality S.D.'s. The flip side to this question is that many S.D.'s are questioning where the quality S.B.'s are! A very wise Guru looked at my profile and gave me some advice which I appreciate and value the wisdom of his words.. so I have been adjusting it and realized it was okay in my profile to post what I will not accept which includes P4P. A well written profile is key but a little mystery is okay too.. I realized I do not need to toot my own horn but instead use my artistic side to paint a picture with words without giving too much away initially.. remove hints of living alone etc. let my self show and be genuine but at the same time providing myself more anonymity. Even investing now in a throw away phone to give that number out instead of my real phones that lead right back to my home address. ;)
So what brought all this on? Hm-mm lets see.. paying for trips to meet a Pot Fake S.D. who promised to reimburse for the trip and did not... paying for an expensive dinner for another Pot S.D. when he created a scene...lol... a series of emails, text and a phone call from one that had not even gotten to the meet stage yet who got his rocks off by scaring me and even told me after he did so that he does it all the time and masturbates when he finally gets the girls number to make her think he actually knows her, where she lives.. and has no intentions of ever meeting or entering an arrangement. He learns about them by lurking in blogs or on face-book.. yes social network sites. At one point took over one month of emailing and talking on the phone with one Pot.. to learn when meeting him that he had kinks and wanted to dress his S.B. and send her down to a bar to watch her pick up a stranger.. go screw him in their hotel room and then join back up with him so he could taste the left overs and get all the details and then compare it to his technique. He was into things like fisting.. rough play and so on... so needless to say in my search I have gotten very discouraged.
Not being in an relationship has left me oversexed .. and really wanting to find that quality S.D. the kind that I know so well , who understands what a traditional sugar relationship is really about and appreciates a Sugar Babe who pampers back.. and gives him all her attention when they are together... one who is low maintenance , loyal, respectful, easy to talk to, open and honest, and one who avoids bringing drama into the arrangement. It is funny but it seems that the genuine quality S.D.'s that I seek are more intrigued with the drama filled S.B.'s who have drug problems..lol.. so I continue to search and question what I am doing wrong that is attracting all the losers. I just had new pictures taken of me in outdoor and indoor settings that give nothing away except a sweet smile and if they want more pictures they will have to ask for them and only after I have asked a few questions of my own. I am getting a lot more contacts in the past month then in the past yet Quantity means nothing in the scheme of things when there is no quality in the gene pool. Have you ran into similar situations?
In my next part I will share the story of Mr. Bobblehead and how that experience has motivated me to not give up on quest. I call him Bobblehead for a reason which I will soon reveal.. true story but a definite Ouch! for many..;) Also my list of desirable traits that separate a Pot SD from the rest and put him in my quality category.
Showing posts with label sugar dating. Show all posts
Showing posts with label sugar dating. Show all posts
What every SB needs: a good wardrobe..How To do it on the cheap.
Starting out in the sugar world it is important to have a good basic wardrobe so you can dress for any occasion. A handful of designer items is essential.. I have always focused on accessories as a few designer accessories like Prada, Chanel, etc. can go along way in dressing up an outfit.
Second hand designer shops and consignment shops are an excellent resource for this. Today many of the high end designer consignment shops are online. I am posting some of my favorites.
Love these shoes and yes ladies you will see when you go to that website they are sold..he he he guess who bought them? The key is to be selective choosing items that are timeless and can be interchanged with other pieces. I often find items that have not been worn and even still have the tags on them at a fraction of the price. You need to know your size, and I have even found items that are current in the stores and have actually tried that outfit on first then went back home and logged in online an purchased it..he he he.. of course being frugal is not for everyone but not all SD's are shopping men or gift daddies but still want us to fit into their world. I have found this is what works for me but I also purchased every day clothing items as well and today have an amazing wardrobe.
Links:
Le Thrift is one of my favorites and have lots of Chanel, Dior, Fendi, Coach, Dolce & Gabbana, Gucci, Kors, Prada and so much more.. they ship quickly and I have been very happy with everything I have gotten through them.
Tra Tutti Consignment has a shop by designer section which I love and wow have I found some deals there!!
McShane's Exchange is in Chicago and I have found some amazing things there both in the store and online.. this is another one that is worth bookmarking.
http://mcshaneexchange.com/index.html
Christabelles Closet you may have heard of as it has been mentioned on Oprah,Shape, Early Show, Abc News, Fox and Friends and more... you can save 80% and sometimes even a little more. Great variety and sizes for all. Even has a Ten Dollar clearance closet... yes you are reading that right.
http://www.christabellescloset.com/
Rice and Beans Vintage Affordable Luxuries.
100% Authentic Designer Vintage and Modern Designer Clothing from Chanel, Christian Dior, Emilio Pucci, St. John, Yves Saint Laurent, Burberry, Missoni, Gucci, Lanvin, Salvatore Ferragamo, Bonnie Cashin, Diane von Furstenberg, Escada, Hermes, Pierre Cardin, Fendi, Valentino, Marc Jacobs, and much more.
http://www.riceandbeansvintage.com/
4 ever Michelle Couture:
lots of high end designers, I can always find something there.
http://www.shop.4evermichellecouture.com/
Label Lovers Boutique:
D&G, Marc Jacobs, Prada, Burberry, Juicy Couture, Coach, and many more.
http://stores.labelloversboutique.com/StoreFront.bok
Covet shop is another one of my favorites need to have a little extra cash here but love their high end items most everything I have gotten there is new. http://www.covetshop.com/489/All_New
And yes girls lots of
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To Be or Not to Be in the Sugar World
I recently have received quite a few emails from others who are exploring the sugar world. Each of them is trying to figure out if the sugar world is right for them and to some extent what a sugar relationship entails as they have started meeting a few Potentials. I am addressing it here in my blog but first must state that each person in the sugar world will have different experiences and encounters and you must know yourself and how you handle various situations to determine if it is right for you.
Why a sugar arrangement? Each of us have different reasons for exploring the sugar world and the misconception about greed does not apply to everyone. For some it is about goals they want to meet.. starting their own business.. college tuition .. help with books or software.. living expenses.. something they are saving for. For others it is about clothes, gifts, saving in a hard economy or just making ends meet and not going under. For some experience Sugars it is all about the excitement of the sugar relationship, getting to experience things they would not have the opportunity to do otherwise, going to exotic places and being a companion, friend and lover. A sugar arrangement also opens up many doors at times.. you can learn from the relationship where you are mentored.. learn about investments.. how to meet and reach your goals. For me I have found that a sugar arrangement can be very sweet.. better than chocolate. ;)
What it takes to be a Sugar Babe?
Some will tell you it takes tenacity, a tough skin, the ability to deal with rejection, the ability to role play. Others will say it takes skill to separate your real life from the sugar life, having the ability to spot a fake, and the ability to know when to say pass. To some extent it takes all these things but I have learned through time that the most important element to bring to the table is your honest self. Always be true to yourself and understand what you are getting into, gifts and financial help is wonderful but we sugars have our end to hold up as well. We need to learn right from the beginning what is expected from us and what are expectations are as well. Some Sugar Daddies have certain kinks and we need to ask questions that let us know if we are going to be comfortable in this type of situation, are we comfortable traveling immediately to foreign countries, going to swingers clubs if this is his kink? Being a Sugar takes courage to ask some difficult questions, honesty to allow the SD to feel connected to us. The arrangement is about finding someone who cares about our well-being and wants to help us.. to do this we need to show who we are to some extent and not put on airs or claim we know things that we don't. At times for me being a Sugar Babe is being able to face rejection gracefully, always keep open communication, be willing to grow and explore, be a best friend at times, a confidante, a lover, be discreet in public and wild cat behind clothes doors and in doing all this always be true to myself and be myself.
When to accept an arrangement: Never accept an arrangement that does not feel right.. do not settle as those types of arrangements never last long! If you are not comfortable dating a married SD simply do not agree to even meet those.. lately I have been contemplating why both sexes have the feeling that the other is so fake. It is because we do not bring our authentic self into the arrangement.. both sides sometimes present a facade that is not who they are. They pretend to have more than they do, use outdated pictures and basically are just curiosity seekers who this is a game to. Some are simply picture collectors and lately I came to the conclusion that the pictures I put on my profile will be what they will see until the first meeting. I am focused on a SD who wants more than just sex.. he wants to feel a connection and knows that building that bond makes me want to pamper and spoil him as well. With the downturn of the economy I have heard many tales how SD's feel sorry for a potential SB and send money before even meeting and having an arrangement. My advice to those SD's DO NOT DO THAT!!! and RUN. It is those wannabees who give sugars a bad name everywhere.
For someone who is exploring this life style ask yourself what you have to bring to the table and if it will affect how you view yourself? If you are just looking for a fast buck... join an escort service as real sugars are not escorts we are the complete package and we go the extra lengths to look good. Eat healthy, stay hydrated, work out, pay close attention to our skin, hair, nails, feet, and how we dress. We know how to look a million bucks even if we don't have much money.. and we know how to treat our men. Not everyone can be a sugar.
Why a sugar arrangement? Each of us have different reasons for exploring the sugar world and the misconception about greed does not apply to everyone. For some it is about goals they want to meet.. starting their own business.. college tuition .. help with books or software.. living expenses.. something they are saving for. For others it is about clothes, gifts, saving in a hard economy or just making ends meet and not going under. For some experience Sugars it is all about the excitement of the sugar relationship, getting to experience things they would not have the opportunity to do otherwise, going to exotic places and being a companion, friend and lover. A sugar arrangement also opens up many doors at times.. you can learn from the relationship where you are mentored.. learn about investments.. how to meet and reach your goals. For me I have found that a sugar arrangement can be very sweet.. better than chocolate. ;)
What it takes to be a Sugar Babe?
Some will tell you it takes tenacity, a tough skin, the ability to deal with rejection, the ability to role play. Others will say it takes skill to separate your real life from the sugar life, having the ability to spot a fake, and the ability to know when to say pass. To some extent it takes all these things but I have learned through time that the most important element to bring to the table is your honest self. Always be true to yourself and understand what you are getting into, gifts and financial help is wonderful but we sugars have our end to hold up as well. We need to learn right from the beginning what is expected from us and what are expectations are as well. Some Sugar Daddies have certain kinks and we need to ask questions that let us know if we are going to be comfortable in this type of situation, are we comfortable traveling immediately to foreign countries, going to swingers clubs if this is his kink? Being a Sugar takes courage to ask some difficult questions, honesty to allow the SD to feel connected to us. The arrangement is about finding someone who cares about our well-being and wants to help us.. to do this we need to show who we are to some extent and not put on airs or claim we know things that we don't. At times for me being a Sugar Babe is being able to face rejection gracefully, always keep open communication, be willing to grow and explore, be a best friend at times, a confidante, a lover, be discreet in public and wild cat behind clothes doors and in doing all this always be true to myself and be myself.
When to accept an arrangement: Never accept an arrangement that does not feel right.. do not settle as those types of arrangements never last long! If you are not comfortable dating a married SD simply do not agree to even meet those.. lately I have been contemplating why both sexes have the feeling that the other is so fake. It is because we do not bring our authentic self into the arrangement.. both sides sometimes present a facade that is not who they are. They pretend to have more than they do, use outdated pictures and basically are just curiosity seekers who this is a game to. Some are simply picture collectors and lately I came to the conclusion that the pictures I put on my profile will be what they will see until the first meeting. I am focused on a SD who wants more than just sex.. he wants to feel a connection and knows that building that bond makes me want to pamper and spoil him as well. With the downturn of the economy I have heard many tales how SD's feel sorry for a potential SB and send money before even meeting and having an arrangement. My advice to those SD's DO NOT DO THAT!!! and RUN. It is those wannabees who give sugars a bad name everywhere.
For someone who is exploring this life style ask yourself what you have to bring to the table and if it will affect how you view yourself? If you are just looking for a fast buck... join an escort service as real sugars are not escorts we are the complete package and we go the extra lengths to look good. Eat healthy, stay hydrated, work out, pay close attention to our skin, hair, nails, feet, and how we dress. We know how to look a million bucks even if we don't have much money.. and we know how to treat our men. Not everyone can be a sugar.
The Screening Process: Final Thoughts
If you have doubts trust your gut!! Never be afraid to ask questions and I have had an additional question that I have had to ask when negotiating an arrangement. Now I make sure I know my Pot's kinks!!
Oh yes I do ask... I want to know how he envisions the sexuality of his sugar mate.. what kinks he has and what he expects to explore behind closed doors. I have quickly discovered that you can have chemistry and click with someone but some kinks may be something that I am not comfortable with. I recently turned down an offer of arrangement as I was not comfortable that he had two other sugars and often takes all sugars on trips together and expects the girls to all interact with each on a sexual level and according to his instructions and fantasies. I had not met these women.. no idea what they look like.. who they are.. and did not feel that this arrangement was mutually beneficial for me when I am giving away my right to choose who I am with.
Know your Pot's expectations.. are they realistic, do they fit your own. If this arrangement is one where you need to move you need to know from the beginning how much additional support you will receive for moving such as apartment allowance, moving allowance etc. and never do anything without getting the money first.. any one can say you will be reimbursed but not everyone means what they say.
With Craigs List removing their adult service section, I have noticed I am getting more hits on my profile that I have online. I have noticed an increase at how many of the contacts I receive do not really have an understanding of life in the sugar bowl and are basically just looking to meet get laid and move on. This is why it is so important to screen and be patient. Often if our finances are tight it makes it even harder to be selective but the wait is worth it.
Recently I was excited about meeting a new Pot... I asked all the right questions.. talked on the phone numerous times before the meet and even skyped a few times and their was no mistaking the connection. We met at a restaurant overlooking a lake.. he was the perfect gentlemen.. had all the right answers.. dressed well.. drove a car that reflected his wealth. So you are thinking WOW she finally found the SD she is looking for and is back off the market, right? Wrong. Leased Car.. and quickly learned when the bill came for dinner and the best wine money can buy.. that three times he would give the waiter a credit card.. three different ones and they were all declined and here I sit thinking not again.. I already did the dutch thing..felt I did not want to make a scene again so pulled out my debit card and took a big hit in my bank balance to the tune of close to 600 bucks.. yep that is right.. omg.. this is what I did not need. When we left the restaurant I suggested he sit in my car a few minutes to talk and I asked him how he felt he could afford an arrangement when it is obvious his credit cards are maxed out.. He claimed this often happens as he is so busy he often forgets to send in the checks.. yeah right.. he also told me he would pay me back and then even had the audacity to ask me if I could loan him a few bucks. We are taught to look for clues like the Rolex on his wrist.. some knockoffs today are hard to spot.. and his was real so I suggested he pawn it and foot his own bills.. I know that sounds harsh but an arrangement needs to be built on trust to reach a certain level of hotness. It needs a certain level of passion and mutual chemistry.. chemistry often falls apart where deceit enters in.
When he got out of the car I knew this was another one of those experiences that I was going to learn from.. what I learned is no matter how carefully we screen we are still going to meet our share of duds but in the process I was letting my true personality show.. the nice person who has compassion for people, giving too much away about myself too soon. So I have a meet scheduled for an hour from now with another Pot... will this one be any different as I have shared quite a bit with him.. this is a second meet and the first setting had potential enough for me to agree to a second meeting. He is older, much older than I would have considered in his late 60's but hot for his age. He also did something that I have not run across before.. suggesting that the second meeting be open ended so I do not plan to leave right after dinner. So drinks and dancing are included and we shall see from there. He wants to talk arrangement over dinner tonight and get down to my bottom line on what I need.. expectations.. and asked me to make a mental list of what I feel would be the ideal arrangement for the two of us. In the past Pot's have often been concerned with their viewpoint their needs and this is what made me aware that I was not finding quality that I sought after.. like who took the mutual out of mutually beneficial arrangement. The search can be fun, the meets can be exciting but if you do not do your homework and pay attention to those little signs and clues that tell you what kind of person your Pot really is.. then you will find much drama in the search along with aggravation. Now I am actively searching profiles myself instead of just responding to those who are contacting me. I am also being more selective and no longer restricting myself to only my area.
Oh yes I do ask... I want to know how he envisions the sexuality of his sugar mate.. what kinks he has and what he expects to explore behind closed doors. I have quickly discovered that you can have chemistry and click with someone but some kinks may be something that I am not comfortable with. I recently turned down an offer of arrangement as I was not comfortable that he had two other sugars and often takes all sugars on trips together and expects the girls to all interact with each on a sexual level and according to his instructions and fantasies. I had not met these women.. no idea what they look like.. who they are.. and did not feel that this arrangement was mutually beneficial for me when I am giving away my right to choose who I am with.
Know your Pot's expectations.. are they realistic, do they fit your own. If this arrangement is one where you need to move you need to know from the beginning how much additional support you will receive for moving such as apartment allowance, moving allowance etc. and never do anything without getting the money first.. any one can say you will be reimbursed but not everyone means what they say.
With Craigs List removing their adult service section, I have noticed I am getting more hits on my profile that I have online. I have noticed an increase at how many of the contacts I receive do not really have an understanding of life in the sugar bowl and are basically just looking to meet get laid and move on. This is why it is so important to screen and be patient. Often if our finances are tight it makes it even harder to be selective but the wait is worth it.
Recently I was excited about meeting a new Pot... I asked all the right questions.. talked on the phone numerous times before the meet and even skyped a few times and their was no mistaking the connection. We met at a restaurant overlooking a lake.. he was the perfect gentlemen.. had all the right answers.. dressed well.. drove a car that reflected his wealth. So you are thinking WOW she finally found the SD she is looking for and is back off the market, right? Wrong. Leased Car.. and quickly learned when the bill came for dinner and the best wine money can buy.. that three times he would give the waiter a credit card.. three different ones and they were all declined and here I sit thinking not again.. I already did the dutch thing..felt I did not want to make a scene again so pulled out my debit card and took a big hit in my bank balance to the tune of close to 600 bucks.. yep that is right.. omg.. this is what I did not need. When we left the restaurant I suggested he sit in my car a few minutes to talk and I asked him how he felt he could afford an arrangement when it is obvious his credit cards are maxed out.. He claimed this often happens as he is so busy he often forgets to send in the checks.. yeah right.. he also told me he would pay me back and then even had the audacity to ask me if I could loan him a few bucks. We are taught to look for clues like the Rolex on his wrist.. some knockoffs today are hard to spot.. and his was real so I suggested he pawn it and foot his own bills.. I know that sounds harsh but an arrangement needs to be built on trust to reach a certain level of hotness. It needs a certain level of passion and mutual chemistry.. chemistry often falls apart where deceit enters in.
When he got out of the car I knew this was another one of those experiences that I was going to learn from.. what I learned is no matter how carefully we screen we are still going to meet our share of duds but in the process I was letting my true personality show.. the nice person who has compassion for people, giving too much away about myself too soon. So I have a meet scheduled for an hour from now with another Pot... will this one be any different as I have shared quite a bit with him.. this is a second meet and the first setting had potential enough for me to agree to a second meeting. He is older, much older than I would have considered in his late 60's but hot for his age. He also did something that I have not run across before.. suggesting that the second meeting be open ended so I do not plan to leave right after dinner. So drinks and dancing are included and we shall see from there. He wants to talk arrangement over dinner tonight and get down to my bottom line on what I need.. expectations.. and asked me to make a mental list of what I feel would be the ideal arrangement for the two of us. In the past Pot's have often been concerned with their viewpoint their needs and this is what made me aware that I was not finding quality that I sought after.. like who took the mutual out of mutually beneficial arrangement. The search can be fun, the meets can be exciting but if you do not do your homework and pay attention to those little signs and clues that tell you what kind of person your Pot really is.. then you will find much drama in the search along with aggravation. Now I am actively searching profiles myself instead of just responding to those who are contacting me. I am also being more selective and no longer restricting myself to only my area.
The Screening Process: Getting it Right Part 1
Most of us can agree that as we search for a sugar arrangement, it is often very hard to to determine who is real or fake. Sugar Dating has changed as it has transcended into the online medium. There are many web sites out there that cater or appear to cater to the Sugar Daddies or Sugar Babies , however, even some of these sites are not what they appear to be. I touched on an earlier post about some sites that share data bases and when I had searched on some of these I was surprised to find how many how had even logged in for over 1 year or longer. There are so many curiosity seekers out there today.. seen an article or show about sugar dating and basically viewed it as a way to get quick sex and many of them have no idea what a real sugar dad/babe even is or does.
As I started searching for a new arrangement, I have stumbled on many contacts that seemed to have all the right answers to the questions I asked.. and when the meeting takes place they are nothing like what they claim to be. I started rereading archived blogs.. and discovered how many people feel the same way I do and have similar experiences. I started paying attention to statements regarding what SD/SB's wish they had asked and did not. This led to a whole new list of questions that I have been asking before I will agree to meet someone. At first I felt awkward about asking some of these questions but quickly was greeted with appreciation by potentials as many have commented to me that they appreciate my addressing some issues and asking them things they feel also needs to be said.
I just had an amazing first meet with one pot recently that I got to know through my list of questions and was so grateful that I had a SD with quality. My point is I was able to learn more about his character.. if he has any sexual kinks.. what his preferences are.. I know exactly what he is willing to do in an arrangement.. what his average length of arrangement is.. know his food preferences.. the type of dress he prefers his SB to wear in public and after the first meeting I was given a very generous gift certificate which shows me a hint into his generosity. Before the meeting we discussed how long we would both be comfortable with on the initial meet.. and where would be the best place for that.. which would reflect both of our food taste. He learned through me what some of my interest were and took me on a lovely little trip where he also gifted me some electronic toys which I was very pleased and grateful for. I do not require gifts but love an occasional something that lets me know we are good together during the arrangement.
As I had gotten most of the difficult questions out of the way before we met.. we just enjoyed our time together.. no sex at this point of course.. just getting to know each other but as the saying goes "I like what I see... I have changed it to I Respect What I See" and finally I am finding quality SD's out there.. as I have had the privilege of having quality in a SD before I knew it existed just did not realize how all the good ones appeared to be taken. Developing a list of questions that helps you to determine just how real they are is actually important. Holding them to a high standard is equally important. In part 2 I will list my new questions but I encourage you to look at how you presently screen a potential albeit SB or SD and really think about what you need to know to see if their value system and kinks are mutual for starters. I also discovered a neat little device that when they send you email to your personal email account or one set up just to screen like gmail or yahoo.. how you can check out the ip address and located the town it is assigned too. There are many little things we can do that are free to see if someone is telling us the truth or a lie.. but if they say they are at home in an email and tell you they are from for example Cincinnati and their account pings in Mexico.. the old adage buyer beware applies. Some people operate under anonymity which is fine.. but as you check out the little things and nothing checks out.. well for me I just move on now. Stay tuned for the List!
Searching for my Mister Big
The hardest part of searching for me is the introduction. My first experience in the sugar world was by chance.. meeting someone on an airplane and through this chance meeting it materialized to me flying to him when he called. The level of excitement that would course through my veins was so high, the anticipation of what we do during our time together.. the magic of a behind closed doors relationship. In some ways I was groomed by him to be what he wanted me to be and I was young enough to be naive enough to go along with it. As the relationship developed I spent more and more time with him and basically found myself a kept woman at his beck and call which developed into a real relationship. There is no fairy tale as a person grows up and realizes they have lost their own personality and yet the finer things in life beckon and call. In the sugar coated world I gained an appreciation to travel, having the chances to visit famous archeological ruins, museums that house the most amazing collections of fine art. I learned so many life lessons that helped me to develop as a person and the journey was worth it.
As I look back I realize how grateful I am for the opportunities that were presented to me..however..in retrospect he was not the person I would have chosen if I had been searching for a sugar daddy. Now I am looking for another amazing experience but have quickly discovered that the easiest way to do this is through internet technology and there are many sites available for that.. there are also sites that share databases which all require you to sign up for their services at a monthly fee. The problem with shared databases is that a large percentage of the data base is inactive members. The second problem I have ran across is the profile each person needs to create.. and the level of honesty that not everyone uses in their profiles. I thought by using current photos of myself that this would help weed out people that were not attracted to me right from the start. Instead I found that it opened me up to being a target to a certain type of lurker who basically is collecting photographs and soon goes poof.
In my search I have finally had to ask myself what I am attracted to and what I want out of an arrangement. If an arrangement is going to be mutually beneficial I realized that mutual chemistry was a must, and integrity was also essential. In my life I choose people around me who are honest, hard working, open and loving people... so why would I want less out of the person I would go into an arrangement with. I also have realized I want some one who is spontaneous and enjoys spur of the moment events as well as planned activities and one who likes to make love making moments last and endure for a while. Armed with my self evaluation I started returning inquiries that I had received and arranging to meet a few potentials.
One that I met I will refer to as Mr. Bird not for the obvious choice but as we met at a public place by a fountain at a designated time.. I found myself sitting on a bench looking at my watch and getting annoyed my his lateness and my this annoying bird that kept walking past me. I kept looking around to see why this person was dressed in a bird costume and shaking its tail feathers at me as it kept parading by. I saw no one else around the bird or any signs that gave me a clue to what he was promoting but children were quickly coming up to the bird and parents were taking pictures with their camera phones of their children with this annoying bird. After half an hour I realized that this potential SD was not showing and I got up to go back to my vehicle and head home. As I got to the parking lot I kept hearing a whistle and turned around to find that annoying bird following me and got nervous. As it approached me the bird took off his head and to my surprise this was my pot..lol.. not the approach I expected yet I did find it humorous. He asked me to give him a few minutes to change and we would head to dinner. At first I thought this guy is nuts and I had better run.. but I didn't. I ended up laughing much through dinner and appreciating his sense of humor.. but the picture he had sent me was 15 years old and he looked nothing like the body type I expected and needless to say there was no chemistry there for me except I enjoyed his sense of humor and I still hear from him every few weeks as an email buddy and I am always up for a laugh.
My second potential SD meet required me to travel at my expense 600 miles.. which I choose to get myself a hotel room as it was too far for me to drive back home late at night and being exhausted. I had talked to him 4 times before I agreed to meet but he was also one who did not send accurate pictures.. and actually had lied about his name, his position in life, practically every thing he told me. I did not recognize him when I met him, he had an odor about him that was a complete turnoff to me and he got up from the table at desert to go to the restroom and never came back which left me picking up the check. This trip cost me a few hundred dollars that I could not afford at the time.. but also left me with one of those life lessons that helped me to understand the wisdom of having a potential SD come to your area for the first meet. I never heard from him again and blocked him from contacting me again . I have read that SD's also feel they have been used by SB's so I realize now how important screening is and how much better it is to not give out too much information about one's self until I have met the person and have a chance to get to know the person.
In my next post I will discuss the number one reason to not give out account information right away when one things they have an arrangement and he will wire the money to ones account.
As I look back I realize how grateful I am for the opportunities that were presented to me..however..in retrospect he was not the person I would have chosen if I had been searching for a sugar daddy. Now I am looking for another amazing experience but have quickly discovered that the easiest way to do this is through internet technology and there are many sites available for that.. there are also sites that share databases which all require you to sign up for their services at a monthly fee. The problem with shared databases is that a large percentage of the data base is inactive members. The second problem I have ran across is the profile each person needs to create.. and the level of honesty that not everyone uses in their profiles. I thought by using current photos of myself that this would help weed out people that were not attracted to me right from the start. Instead I found that it opened me up to being a target to a certain type of lurker who basically is collecting photographs and soon goes poof.
In my search I have finally had to ask myself what I am attracted to and what I want out of an arrangement. If an arrangement is going to be mutually beneficial I realized that mutual chemistry was a must, and integrity was also essential. In my life I choose people around me who are honest, hard working, open and loving people... so why would I want less out of the person I would go into an arrangement with. I also have realized I want some one who is spontaneous and enjoys spur of the moment events as well as planned activities and one who likes to make love making moments last and endure for a while. Armed with my self evaluation I started returning inquiries that I had received and arranging to meet a few potentials.
One that I met I will refer to as Mr. Bird not for the obvious choice but as we met at a public place by a fountain at a designated time.. I found myself sitting on a bench looking at my watch and getting annoyed my his lateness and my this annoying bird that kept walking past me. I kept looking around to see why this person was dressed in a bird costume and shaking its tail feathers at me as it kept parading by. I saw no one else around the bird or any signs that gave me a clue to what he was promoting but children were quickly coming up to the bird and parents were taking pictures with their camera phones of their children with this annoying bird. After half an hour I realized that this potential SD was not showing and I got up to go back to my vehicle and head home. As I got to the parking lot I kept hearing a whistle and turned around to find that annoying bird following me and got nervous. As it approached me the bird took off his head and to my surprise this was my pot..lol.. not the approach I expected yet I did find it humorous. He asked me to give him a few minutes to change and we would head to dinner. At first I thought this guy is nuts and I had better run.. but I didn't. I ended up laughing much through dinner and appreciating his sense of humor.. but the picture he had sent me was 15 years old and he looked nothing like the body type I expected and needless to say there was no chemistry there for me except I enjoyed his sense of humor and I still hear from him every few weeks as an email buddy and I am always up for a laugh.
My second potential SD meet required me to travel at my expense 600 miles.. which I choose to get myself a hotel room as it was too far for me to drive back home late at night and being exhausted. I had talked to him 4 times before I agreed to meet but he was also one who did not send accurate pictures.. and actually had lied about his name, his position in life, practically every thing he told me. I did not recognize him when I met him, he had an odor about him that was a complete turnoff to me and he got up from the table at desert to go to the restroom and never came back which left me picking up the check. This trip cost me a few hundred dollars that I could not afford at the time.. but also left me with one of those life lessons that helped me to understand the wisdom of having a potential SD come to your area for the first meet. I never heard from him again and blocked him from contacting me again . I have read that SD's also feel they have been used by SB's so I realize now how important screening is and how much better it is to not give out too much information about one's self until I have met the person and have a chance to get to know the person.
In my next post I will discuss the number one reason to not give out account information right away when one things they have an arrangement and he will wire the money to ones account.
Sugar by Chance
My first exploration into the sugar world was by chance not by design. It is funny that as I look back I did not even realize I was a sugar babe. I met someone at an airport.. and the chemistry was hot.. he was twice my age and we exchanged phone numbers. Within a week we were talking on the phone.. but his age was in the back of my mind. After talking for over a month I agree to see him and he flew me out for a weekend. I was fascinated with his knowledge, loved his guidance and quickly started seeing him on the weekends. I still remember him telling me he wanted to take care of me and make life easier for me and each month he would provide me with financial assistance to help me out.
After close to a year of this.. one day one of my friends informed me I was nothing but a glorified call girl as I was at his beck and call... that did not bother me as I loved the time we shared.. chemistry was off the scale.. and I felt like had the opportunity to explore my own sensuality and sexuality. For me it was such an empowering experience and one that last for quite some time. Our arrangement gave me the freedom to pursue my own dreams and education.. for which I am so grateful. I learned so much from him as a mentor, got to travel to many places that I would not have seen.. but it was those quiet alone times that I appreciated the most. When our arrangement finally ended .. it was all good and we are still friends today to many degrees. What I learned was what an amazing experience this was and how less complicated it was for me from traditional dating.. but in the end he was my Sugar Daddy and I his Sugar Babe.. earlier this year as I was thinking back I thought about this experience and the possibilities of exploring the sugar world online. That led me to a website with the idea of seeking another arrangement.. in the online world I find it harder as we use profiles... people can write anything and it takes time to discover who is real and who is not.
It is also hard to create a profile that reflects who I am and what I have to offer.. but I have learned as I read others profiles to look for signs that might tell me if that person is being real or fake. I do not think being a sugar is for everyone, and each of us has our own reason for doing things.. I love a world that is sugar coated.. one where you can truly let your hair down.. not feel inhibited .. and enjoy everything the other person has to offer.. being able to learn from his experience.. to often travel to some magical places.. and the meetings just can get so intense which is something I never found in traditional dating. In my next post I will focus on the search and what I have learned about looking for the right arrangement and person for me.
After close to a year of this.. one day one of my friends informed me I was nothing but a glorified call girl as I was at his beck and call... that did not bother me as I loved the time we shared.. chemistry was off the scale.. and I felt like had the opportunity to explore my own sensuality and sexuality. For me it was such an empowering experience and one that last for quite some time. Our arrangement gave me the freedom to pursue my own dreams and education.. for which I am so grateful. I learned so much from him as a mentor, got to travel to many places that I would not have seen.. but it was those quiet alone times that I appreciated the most. When our arrangement finally ended .. it was all good and we are still friends today to many degrees. What I learned was what an amazing experience this was and how less complicated it was for me from traditional dating.. but in the end he was my Sugar Daddy and I his Sugar Babe.. earlier this year as I was thinking back I thought about this experience and the possibilities of exploring the sugar world online. That led me to a website with the idea of seeking another arrangement.. in the online world I find it harder as we use profiles... people can write anything and it takes time to discover who is real and who is not.
It is also hard to create a profile that reflects who I am and what I have to offer.. but I have learned as I read others profiles to look for signs that might tell me if that person is being real or fake. I do not think being a sugar is for everyone, and each of us has our own reason for doing things.. I love a world that is sugar coated.. one where you can truly let your hair down.. not feel inhibited .. and enjoy everything the other person has to offer.. being able to learn from his experience.. to often travel to some magical places.. and the meetings just can get so intense which is something I never found in traditional dating. In my next post I will focus on the search and what I have learned about looking for the right arrangement and person for me.
New Beginnings
I have always had a sweet tooth, sweet personality and sweet ideals so it was a natural progression for me delve into the Sugar Coated life of searching for sugar. My blog is simply about my own perceptions of what being a sugar babe is to me and how where my journey takes me.
Many television programs have featured sugar dating in the past couple years.. but none I feel have done it justice. Especially when they compare it to prostitution, when I dated traditionally and dated a person of quality I constantly received gifts or financial help along the way if I needed it. In the sugar world.. the same applies.. the difference for me is that as a Sugar Babe I know I can count on that assistance. As this blog progresses I will explore the mistakes I have made along the way.. what brought me to think about my safety and other concerns along with some of my adventures and how the world has opened up for me.
So join me in this journey and share your experiences as well with me.
Many television programs have featured sugar dating in the past couple years.. but none I feel have done it justice. Especially when they compare it to prostitution, when I dated traditionally and dated a person of quality I constantly received gifts or financial help along the way if I needed it. In the sugar world.. the same applies.. the difference for me is that as a Sugar Babe I know I can count on that assistance. As this blog progresses I will explore the mistakes I have made along the way.. what brought me to think about my safety and other concerns along with some of my adventures and how the world has opened up for me.
So join me in this journey and share your experiences as well with me.
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